Sincere guitar rock, directly from the garages of 1990.
Audrey Smilley is a band, not a girl. It is named after a girl, who lives somewhere in England, but is no longer a girl, but the band is not a girl, nor are there any girls in the band.
We recently remixed and remastered our original recordings. Hear them now like you’ve never heard them before.
Audrey Smilley’s music is available now from Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon, Reverbnation and pretty much anywhere you can find digital music.
Audrey Smilley was formed in 1988 by former members of the Arizona death/goth band Theatre of Ice. Drawing on influences as diverse as Blue Oyster Cult, KISS, Neil Diamond, and the Beatles, Audrey Smilley played shows all over the Wasatch front in Utah. The band’s blend of acoustic and electric guitars with tight three and four part harmonies stands out immediately. Lyrically, Audrey Smilley is eclectic, ranging from love songs to dark humour.
Plagued by an almost endless procession of drummers, the band struggled throughout this period to share its original music with a public steeped in a top 40 mentality. They played throughout Utah up until December of 1990 when the band relocated to southern California.
However, their brand of guitar-based alt-rock was not to break through the hair band stranglehold on the charts until about 1992 (Gin Blossoms, Toad the Wet Sprocket, Refreshments, et. al). Sadly, by then Audrey Smilley was long gone. After a triumphant California debut at a Huntington Beach night club, the band called it quits in the summer of 1991.
Much of the band’s pre-California history was chronicled by Kels Goodman in the independent film, “Audrey Smilley: The Life of a Struggling Band.” It’s a fascinating, if somewhat depressing, look at what the band went through at their peak.
The band reformed for a triumphant reunion show at Velour in Provo, Utah in July 2013. It was full circle for the band who helped blaze the trail for bands playing original music in Provo. After struggling to be heard for so many years, it was serendipitous for the band to play in the Utah County club that launched international acts like the Neon Tree and Imagine Dragons.
In 2015, their original 12-song-CD was remixed and remastered. Hear them now like you’ve never heard them before.
alone
she was only seventeen/another local beauty queen/just trying to make it through another year/when he came into the room she knew/he was the one to see her through/and maybe in the end she might just make it after all/but girl, you should know better/to trust your life to anyone is foolish at its best/and now she spends her nights alone/just waiting by the telephone/(and maybe in a while he’s going to make that call)/at first it was perfection/ ’cause she’d made the right connection/and she knew he’d come around, or so it seemed/’cause when she spent her nights with him, /the heavens called when lights grew dim/and nothing took the place of being in his arms again/but girl, you should know better/just when you think you know him best is when you’ll find him gone/and now she spends her nights alone/just waiting by the telephone/(and maybe in a while he’s going to make that call)/life is all surprises, filled with endless compromises/never knowing what the road ahead of you might find/and when you’ve got it figured out/(what this whole thing is all about)/is usually after they’ve put flowers on your grave/but girl, you should know better/you’ll never get a second chance, so live life while you can/and now she spends her nights alone/just waiting by the telephone/but deep inside, she knows he’ll never call.
english 115
his hands start to sweat as he turns off the ignition/he feels nervous as he walks her to the door/she feels calm and is free from inhibition/she knows that she’s got him and just what she wants him for/she gives a wink from across a crowded classroom/he looks at her and returns it with a smile/they’re holding hands as they walk into the back room/they’re both sure they’ll be together for a while/and it’s like…/looking for an answer, but avoiding all the questions/asking for advice and refusing all suggestions/searching high and low for a face that you can trust/could it be love or are they lost in lust?/his heart skips a beat when he sees her in the doorway/she says hello and rewards him with a smile/she says, “hello” and rewards him with a smile/she drops a hint that she won’t be busy tuesday/he picks it up because he’s captured by her style/they go out to the car and they’re laughing at each other/blue jeans and fish nets well they’re such a lovely pair/they spend their time getting close to one another/they whisper softly as they stroke each others hair/and it’s like…/looking for an answer, but avoiding all the questions/asking for advice and refusing all suggestions/searching high and low for a face that you can trust/could it be love or are they lost in lust?/three a.m. and they’ve forgotten about the hour/she’s breathing softly as he looks into her eyes/they kiss gently and their hearts are gone for now or/could it be forever? there’s just no way to decide/he drives her home his mind is full of explanations/she’s sitting calmly though they’ve not been home all night/he walks her to the door fearful of a confrontation/she kisses him goodbye and turns off the porch step light/and it’s like…/looking for an answer, but avoiding all the questions/asking for advice and refusing all suggestions/searching high and low for a face that you can trust/could it be love or are they lost in lust?
never did the crime
sitting in your room/staring at the wall/i couldn’t say i know exactly why i’m here at all/it seems that only yesterday i was all alone/among the chameleons roaming here down in the nowhere zone/sitting on the floor/looking at your hair/thinking how a chance encounter became a chance affair/inseparably separated by a wall of fears/laughing at ourselves and hiding from our tears/thinking about the past is wasting time/i’m paying the price although i never did the crime/standing in the hall/looking at your door/thinking about a lot of things i never thought before/my head begins to hurt and then my mind goes blank/’cause if i can’t blame you or me i don’t know who i ought to thank/thinking about the past is wasting time/i’m paying the price although i never did the crime/sitting in my room/staring at the wall/i couldn’t say i know exactly why i’m here at all/it seems that only yesterday i was by your side/wondering if it mattered much or if we should have tried/thinking about the past is wasting time/i’m paying the price although i never did the crime.
she
she looked at him and said goodbye/and she took his hand and said don’t cry/’cause it wasn’t worth your tears/you’ll forget me through the years/just remember through your fears/that this was better/he felt his heart break like before/and he could only whisper as she walked through the door/you mean everything to me/and without you i can’t be/even though you disagree/to leave’s not better/why must i lose the very thing that gives me reason/the passion that invades my very soul/and how can i tear apart the lifeblood that beats through me/and build again from where i once was whole?/she took some time to make a brand new start/and he chose a road to still his broken heart/there was nothing in the end/but the flowers that were sent/simply written from a friend/i’ll always love you.
flash
flash in the pan another dry dream/i can’t wake up i can’t hear my own scream/you said it with your lips and you said it with your touch/you set it down in writing — i should have guessed it couldn’t mean much/i guess i shouldn’t be surprised/i been through this too many times/i guess i should have realized/you could always change your mind/the door’s left open as often as not/i wonder where you got your Second Thoughts/you tell yourself too many lies/the phantom screams to be recognized/i put him in a box when i heard he was dead/i took him apart and laid him on your bed/but we’ve both seen the buried come back again/i guess that Joey changed their mind/i won’t give up and i won’t get mean/i won’t let strings cut into your dreams/still, i bleed more than i let on/the secret wound won’t leave me alone/oh but don’t you look surprised/burn my bridges and blind my eyes/i guess you should have realized/ i could never change my mind.
blind lead the blind (blind elvis)
you ever seen the blind lead the blind?/you gotta wonder what they think they’re gonna find/i gotta lot of things i’d like to say to you on my mind/i never asked for this you know/the lightning flashes and the hot winds blow/you are a storm that’s definitely out of control in my heart/so baby now i wanna know am i runnin’ blind?/you might be better off to look ahead and leave the past behind/’cause in my arms you know you’re safe you can’t deny/so take my hand i’ll lead the way…/the blind lead the blind/i know that Elvis is alive today/because i saw him just yesterday/i asked the King if he could tell me one way to make you mine/he said there’s only one way i know/it worked for me a long time ago/so that’s why i’m here singin’ straight to your soul tonight/so baby now i wanna know am i runnin’ blind?/you might be better off to look ahead and leave the past behind/’cause in my arms you know you’re safe you can’t deny/so take my hand i’ll lead the way…/the blind lead the blind.
fence away
staring at these same four walls, as footsteps echo in my brain/the lobby and the empty halls only keep inside the pain/the pictures are up on the boards, the letters in a drawer/and i would try to tell you how i feel, but we’ve said it all before/and i look outside my window and i see that it’s still green/nothing’s changed outside the wall (at least not that i’ve seen)/they say it’s only for my sake-they say it everyday/but i know the only hope for me is just a fence away/oh, just a fence away/domestic bliss and social grace are kept out of my reach/they give a starving dog a rubber bone/impossible and violent, difficult to teach/and try to fix it in a plastic home/and i look outside my window and i see that it still rains/the walls have left the elements immune to any change/they say it’s only for my sake – they say it everyday/but i know the only hope for me is just a fence away/oh, just a fence away/do you even really love me?/i wonder if you do/i don’t know why i’m better off getting well away from you/i guess i finally realize it wasn’t me who couldn’t cope/the moment you abandoned me showed me you gave up all hope/but i look outside my window and i see the snow still melts/rejection, fear and hate and pain are all that i ever felt/ they say it’s only for my sake – they say it everyday/but i know the only hope for me is just a fence away/oh, just a fence away.
postcard
i’ve got a postcard written in my mind/it tells of how i feel about a girl i want to find/and when i find her there’ll be no turning back/but as of now she’s just a dream/i once took my postcard and wrote it in the sand/i thought that it would help me to win a certain hand/but like the tides that came and washed my card away/deep inside i knew it wouldn’t last/i didn’t really feel the way you make me feel right now/i’ve never felt this in the past/postcards can’t describe your eyes/or what you mean to me/and somehow i have got to find a way to make you see/that words alone can’t get across the things i’m trying to say/and i don’t want to take the risk of losing you today/but for the chance to win your heart/ i’m laying it on the line/i bare my soul tonight/well even now i’m not so sure how this is supposed to feel/and i don’t know if there’s a way to prove that this is real/but maybe that’s the answer that i’m looking for/and real life never seemed so cut and dried/the answers can’t be written down by those who think they’ve learned/i guess you find them in due time/and postcards can’t describe your eyes, or what you mean to me/but somehow i have got to find a way to make you see/that words alone can’t get across the things i’m trying to say/and i don’t want to take the risk of losing you today/but for the chance to win your heart, i’m laying it on the line/it’s win or lose tonight.
it’s all right
four nights in a row i walked the streets alone/thinking about how you said goodbye/and i don’t know just what it is got into you/but i’m not going to hang my head and cry/you could leave a thousand times, but i won’t change/and if you come back i’ll still be the same/but if you don’t then that’s o.k. ’cause i’ll get by/i’ve still got the memory of your name/it’s all right/that you’re gone/’cause i know that inside you felt you had to move on/it’s all right/i’m o.k./just think of me once in awhile/yesterday remember when the world was yours and mine/nothing stood between us and our dreams…/i guess it came too easy and that’s why you left so soon/but love is never easy as it seems/tomorrow when you wake up if i’m on your mind/don’t think twice of giving me a call/you know that i’ll be there for you and i’m not that hard to find/come to me, don’t hesitate at all/it’s all right that you’re gone ’cause i know that inside you felt you had to move on/it’s all right, i’m o.k. just think of me once in a while.
jack o. lantern
things ain’t the same, hey jack o. lantern?/skeleton in the closet you come out from/people talkin’, rumors are flyin’/it’s hard to tell the truth from the lyin’/yes i wonder why you look at me that way now/but we all noticed, you ain’t dressin’ quite the same now/pretty spooky, yeah the company you’re keepin’/i’m afraid the faeries may have lit your flame/hey! (hey-ho!) jack o. lantern/ hey! (hey-ho!) jack o. lantern /hey! (hey-ho!) jack o. lantern/ hey! (hey-ho!)/i don’t think you know what you’re doin/i don’t think you want to be losin’/candle wax to the queer sensation/of a big black-bottom devine revelation/An In Depth Savior could take you away/but a trick or treat bag just might save the day/advice i’ll give you if you’re gonna’ turn the cheek/you better be real careful when you pick your bones/hey! (hey-ho!) jack o. lantern/ hey! (hey-ho!) jack o. lantern /hey! (hey-ho!) jack o. lantern/hey! (hey-ho!)/ooga-chucka, ooga-chucka, ooga ooga ooga-chucka…
fingerprints
i opened up the mailbox, the headline screamed you were gone/i guess that means it’s too late to tell you how i felt/i would have started sooner, but i couldn’t find the words/now i’m left to sort the hand that i’ve been dealt/i wanted to tell you everything i felt inside/the feelings that kept us both apart/nothing came between us, but our love finally died/and your fingerprints are still here on my heart/it’s hard for me to think that i’ll never see you again/a fair consequence for my sins, but somehow i’ll live/and at times i want to end it, just quit trying and then/i figure maybe i still got some more to give/i wanted to tell you everything i felt inside/the feelings that kept us both apart/nothing came between us, but our love finally died/and your fingerprints are still here on my heart/i never got the chance to tell you the way i really felt/love and letters always come so hard/and as i watched you leaving me, it was more than I could stand/and you told me you loved me in a card/three years have come and gone and things hardly seem to change/a photo lets me know that you’re not mine/still i wish that i could see you now, i guess my only comfort is/i won’t have to lose you a second time/i wanted to tell you everything i felt inside/the feelings that kept us both apart/nothing came between us, but our love finally died/and your fingerprints are still here on my heart/still here on my heart etc.
losing proposition
the last thing on my mind was falling for you/the last thing on my mind was letting you get in/the last thing that i wanted to do was to let myself feel this way/i knew i was in trouble the minute i let you stay/i knew better than to go out looking for trouble/come home and find it here waiting at my front door/oh what you did and why you did it to me, oh heaven only knows/and God only knows how bad i want you here with me/i’m caught between a rock and a losing proposition/somewhere between the Devil and the deep blue sea/ and no one knows about the chains that bind me/and i know no one can explain it to me/the last thing on my mind was losing you/the last thing on my mind was letting you slip away/ i fooled around and i fell in love, yeah it’s easy enough to say/i fooled around some more and i pushed your love away/i never dreamed you’d be here or that you would leave me/well easy come easy go you know that what they say/ well what you did and why you did it to me oh heaven only knows/ i wonder if you know how bad i want you here with me/i’m caught between a rock and a losing proposition/somewhere between the Devil and the deep blue sea/ and no one knows about the chains that bind me/and i know no one can explain it to me.
love leaves a scar
you bring the pills, i’ll write the prose/baptized in the riptide undertows/waiting for the last good time to come/it always does and we all hang on/love leaves a scar/tie it off before the start/suck the blood from a wounded heart/love leaves a mark/a stain/maybe i live in the past too much/a memory makes a perfect crutch/it might break your heart no one cares/i guess i can’t take me anywhere/love leaves a scar/tie it off before the start/suck the blood from a wounded heart/love leaves a mark/a stain/you said you love me like you had a choice/the devil quotes scripture in a pleasing voice/give it away or keep what you got/in the end god gets what he wants/love leaves a scar/tie it off before the start/suck the blood from a wounded heart/love leaves a mark/a stain.
baby
baby/why’d you have to go and say the things that you said?/baby/don’t you know that your words are like a gun to my head/there’s a rumor that i’m hearing and it’s making the rounds/they’re saying you’re up, but baby i’m down/baby/i …/need …/you …/baby/why did you have to go and leave me here all alone?/baby/i never got a letter or a call on the phone/won’tcha catch the next bus and come back to me/bring me back a little bit of my sanity/oh now/baby/i …/need …/you …/i’m in for it now/a one-way ticket to lonelytown baby/i’m in for it now/my heart is breaking and i don’t mean maybe/baby/don’t go telling me that you don’t love me anymore/baby/my love’s bottled note that’s just been washed ashore/there’s a moon up above and the stars in the sky/there’s a sweet summer breeze, but no you, only i/whoa now/baby/i …/need …/well I need …/I …/need…/you …
peppermint and innocence
valerie and julie, put the game in play/july the fourth and new year’s eve, wrapped up on christmas day/terri made it dangerous, and starri made me laugh/and every one of them is with me, like a photograph/then life moved on and everybody went their separate way/their memories forever in my mind/and every now and then i think of you and how it felt/to leave peppermint and innocence behind/jenny came from nowhere, but it wasn’t a surprise/but kerri left a combination smilingin disguise/rebecca had a boyfriend, or so she didn’t say/but when he left for summer aphrodite came to play/then life moved on and everybody went their separate way/their memories forever in my mind/and every now/and then i think of you and how it felt/to leave peppermint and innocence behind/two o’clock with paris, then three and four and five/never a better birthday gift made me feel so alive/then jackie had a special way of driving me insane/but every time she smiled i just about forgot my name/then life moved on and everybody went their separate way/their memories forever in my mind/and every now and then i think of you and how it felt/to leave peppermint and innocence behind/peppermint and innocence behind/peppermint and innocence behind/peppermint and innocence behind/peppermint and innocence behind …
All lyrics Copyright 1988, 1990, 2018, 2023 by Audrey Smilley. All rights reserved.
